10 pick-up lines that totally work 100 per cent of the time, every time*

1. “Are you a high priest of the cult of Kali? Because you just tore out my still-beating heart and enslaved my body and soul.”

2. “I’m not a photographer, but I can picture you and me together.“

3. “Wanna come back to my place and see my cobra?”

4. “You must be a red mushroom, because you make me bigger.”

5. “I’m going outside to make out. Wanna join me?”

6. “If I could rearrange the alphabet, U and I would be having sex in my car.”

7. “Do you have a needle and thread? ‘Cause I’m ripped.”

8. “Wow, baby, you’re an angel. Can you touch me like one?”

9. “I’ve forgotten where I live; may I stay at your place?”

10. “Do you have a keg in your pants? Because I’d like to tap dat ass.” 

*Pick-up lines may not work 100 per cent of the time. Possible side effects of using these pick-up lines may include hurt feelings, slapping of the users’ facial cheek, mocking laughter toward the user, regret, as well as increased solo consumption of alcohol and/or ice cream. Always consult your wingman before attempting pick-up lines.

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