The Martlet

What would you do if you were attacked?

This thought became very real to me over the weekend, when my partner and I playfully tackled each other.

We were just fooling around, but he managed to pin me down. I remember looking up at his grin and hearing him say that he will always be stronger than me. He seemed to take great pride in that, as if it is manly to be strong, and that’s how it should be.

I didn’t like this idea very much. I enjoy the thought of being muscular and strong.

I was part of the swim team for 10 years way back when and, ever since I quit, I have always tried to maintain the muscle and strength I gained in the pool and gym.

Throughout elementary and high school, I was always more muscular than my female friends and I thought my muscles were unattractive and unfeminine.

I always hid my arms and hated to wear tank tops. But now I am trying to build up my strength, muscle, and fitness.

When I looked up at my partner pinning me down, as I desperately tried to wriggle my way out of his grasp, I just couldn’t do it, no matter how hard I strained.

I attempted to squirm out every way imaginable (without hurting him too much) but to no avail.

It got me so angry — I didn’t want to prove him right, that men are, in general, the stronger sex. And not all men are stronger than women, that’s for sure.

I tried to hold him down, but every time I pinned him, he managed to effortlessly throw me off.

It really got me thinking — what if I was attacked? Just the thought of a strong person doing that to any weaker person is very frightening, and a sobering thought when put to the (even playful) test.

I try to lift weights as much as possible, and I like to think that I am super strong and can beat anyone in an arm wrestle, but I have come to realize I am not as strong as I like to think. While this removal from immortality is, at times, nerve wracking, it’s also an important step for each of us to take — to some degree.

Stats show that about one in eight women will be sexually assulted in their life time. Sexual abuse and sexual harassment are very prevalent throughout the world, no matter what society we live in. This scares me.

Even though it was just me and my partner tackling each other, it’s true that the situation became very real to me.

If I couldn’t escape my partner’s grasp — when he wasn’t even trying that hard — how would I ever escape someone who was trying to hurt me?

All we can do is hope for the best and, despite the lurking facts, avoid fearing the statistics.

Needless to say, I no longer think muscles or being strong is in any way “ugly” or “unfeminine.” Not only do I think that big, toned muscles on females are sexy, but they definitely make me feel strong.

One day, I want to have enough confidence to feel like I will never be powerless in a frightening situation. I think it is important as a human, and especially a female, to never be afraid of threats and always feel empowered.

I am going to continue trying to pin down my partner until he can’t escape from me, so that one day he’ll have to admit that I really am stronger than him.