The Martlet

UVic’s unfortunate male-female ratio means the dating pickings for a straight girl are awful slim. So, some of us have learned to be creative.

I’ve seen some girls who reel ‘em in and hang on for dear life. Others who prefer the catch and release method: grab, go, repeat.

After ending my first serious relationship in the first semester of last year, I was in desperate need of some distraction.

The first weeks of January were madness. Deadlines, term papers, lab hours and term summaries all vied for first priority in my mind. I was getting overwhelmed.

Then along came Ben.

He was an older guy in my year who happened to be pants-meltingly attractive. We had seen each other outside of class but we’d never really been alone.

“So, would you like to go for coffee sometime?” he asked.

Ah, the world’s greatest non-committal date line! If you don’t hit it off, it was just coffee. No big deal. But if it does...

“Sure. Yeah, I’d like that.”

It went okay. He even picked me up and walked me home afterward. And he paid for both of us! The conversation was casual, relaxed, and flirty. Sparks were starting to fly.

And then, “Do you mind if I check my phone? My girlfriend was supposed to text me.”

Oh, yes. Of course.

Any chemistry we had evaporated instantly in that moment.

I went home, finished some schoolwork, and went to sleep. I never brought it up with him again, but I thought about it constantly.

If he was involved with someone, why did he ask me out? And why did he pay for everything, open all the doors, if it wasn’t a date? What the hell was

going on?

I had been snagged by the Fake Date, the best way to test the unsuspecting party for compatibility without actually risking the humiliation of a bad date. No risks, no problem.

Two months later, Ben struck again. Commitment-free caffeination. But this new place was nicer, and actual food was ordered. A good sign. We finished, he paid. We were about to say goodbye when I decided I wanted a little more.

“What next?”

“I hoped you’d say that.”

We went to Willows Beach, walked on the sand for about an hour. I found out about his future plans, his sisters’ names, and the text girl who didn’t work out as well as he’d wanted.

He dropped me back at home, and we had a lovely parting moment. I walked away knowing I had once again Fake Dated, but it was different. I think we both sensed there was a connection, even if it wasn’t fiery and super-romantic.

Nothing ever came of it, and part of me never wanted it to be more. Ben doesn’t go to UVic anymore. He promised to come visit his friends here throughout the year. Will he? Maybe. If he doesn’t, I won’t be heartbroken.

In the meantime, I’d like to enjoy more Fake Dates.