Clam calamity May 22, 2018 Sarah Mayer and Marshall Scott-Bigsby The Martlet reaches out to marine life in Victoria poisoned by SSRIs and other medications We have all heard the saying “happy as a clam,” but we could never really measure...
Now I am become bees, destroyer of clock May 19, 2018May 15, 2018 Marshall Scott-Bigsby Tick-tock, Jamie Cassels. Tick. Tock. Clearihue Clock was first installed in 1963, when the building was unveiled to the public. Nowadays, students might not notice the clock because they have one...
The BC Ferries survival handbook April 23, 2018April 25, 2018 Marshall Scott-Bigsby How to make the most of your hour-and-a-half boat ride It’s that time of year again — students are soon to find themselves soliciting services from an organization that every Vancouver Island uncle refers...
Prof actually gets video playing from laptop on first try April 1, 2018April 2, 2018 Cormac O’Brien "The sound worked and everything," says stunned student For the students in ECON 214 on the morning of March 28, 2018, the situation was a familiar one. Professor Seth Delaney had...
Exposé: UVSS finds alternative source of income by running underground petting zoos February 26, 2018 Marshall Scott-Bigsby The 2017 election for the UVSS was an eternity ago. There’s no practical reason for anyone to remember the campaign promises made so long ago. However, I do. One campaign...
5 ways to make your man think you’re a goddess in bed February 18, 2018February 7, 2018 Jenna MacNeily (According to the patriarchy) 1. Always be excited and ready to have sex whenever your man wants it . . . But don’t have a sex drive of your own The first step to pleasing your...
A Martlet-themed Valentine’s Day film like every other February 13, 2018February 7, 2018 Marshall Scott-Bigsby Adapted from the erotic version The sun sets over a quiet campus. Finals season and shorter days are the perfect combination to encourage students to go back to their homes and...
The Martlet’s 2018 News Headlines January 28, 2018January 28, 2018 Marshall Scott-Bigsby There are few outside of the inner Martlet circles that are aware of this, but the Martlet has every article pre-written by a discount psychic. They then publish them over...
Things to do in Victoria next time you’re waiting for a tsunami January 23, 2018January 23, 2018 Cormac O’Brien 1. Go for a hike Victoria is home to some amazing natural landscapes, and the hours before the total devastation of Vancouver Island is as good a time as any to...
White lies January 21, 2018January 20, 2018 Jack Seaberry I’m tired of being disenfranchised. As a white cis male, I am deeply disturbed by advances in the field of equality. Whereas once our voices would be the only ones heard...
