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Category: Spoof

Spoof

Life after corona: A journey through the wilds of UVic

April 1, 2020April 1, 2020
Alec Lazenby
The quad is an overgrown mess of grass, with the occasional forgotten Blundstone and slackline still dotting the landscape. The nostalgia-inducing smell of freshly burnt coffee, which surprisingly could still

Students of residence tire of UVic’s COVID-19 policies, take over University Centre in protest

April 1, 2020April 1, 2020
Michael John Lo
In a stunning turn of events, UVic students have (once again) occupied the University Centre in a protest — and this time, it’s in protest of UVic’s mercurial response to

Pro-oil club doesn’t feel represented at UVic, but the Ostrich is here to change that

April 1, 2019April 1, 2019
Kate Korte
In the coming months, we’ll be publishing more informative articles about the oil and gas industry. We’ll also be covering all Edmonton Oilers hockey games instead of the UVic Vikes'.

The UVSS will now be editing our stories so they are ‘on message’

April 1, 2019April 1, 2019
Devon Bidal
Finally, the UVSS has kindly decided to edit our articles before they are published.

Ka-ching! Ka-ching! Hear those graduation bells ring!

April 1, 2019April 1, 2019
Devon Bidal
With all the pressure that comes with graduation, it can be difficult to look on the bright side. But the Ostrich is here to help. As a graduating student, you

Letter from the editor: We’ve listened to your feedback, love the Ostrich

April 1, 2019April 1, 2019
Anna Dodd
We know, we know. The Martlet is too socialist. We're too judgmental. We're too critical. We're too anti-UVic. Anti-oil and pipelines. Anti-UVSS. What are you funding us for, anyways? And

Exclusive: UVSS slates leaked ahead of 2020 election

March 28, 2019March 24, 2019
Emily Fagan
As with any good election cycle, though the 2019 student elections are over, our coverage of the 2020 UVSS elections has only just begun. Below are the names and platforms

Valentine’s Day coupons for you and yours

February 9, 2017February 8, 2017
Alistair Ogden and Martlet Staff
Frantically searching for a last minute gift for your loved one that will perfectly articulate those feelings you’ve been feeling? The Martlet has covered. Cut out any and all of...

Lunar eclipse means Valentine’s Day horoscopes not so ideal

February 9, 2017February 8, 2017
Anna Dodd
With the lunar eclipse occurring right before Valentine’s Day, everything appears to have gone wack this year. From incest to crippling loneliness to possible death, looking to the stars for...

Chicken soup for the feverish soul

January 26, 2017January 31, 2017
Alistair Ogden
Ingredients: 1 chicken breast 1 package of noodles, owner unknown (but it’s probably your roommate’s) 2 cups of water 1 cup of vegetable broth (definitely stolen from your roommate) 1 carrot 1 head of broccoli (it’s...
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#uvic - The question on everyone's minds right now #uvic - The question on everyone's minds right now: when will we be done with zoom classes? Here's the latest info we have on what UVic's plans are.

Do you have questions about a potential return to campus or BC's vaccination plans for young people? Leave them in the comments and we will try to answer them in our next explainer post.
In our latest issue, Senior Staff Writer Chris Dri In our latest issue, Senior Staff Writer Chris Driscoll admits that he wishes he would've written more for the Martlet during his degree. Chris says that anyone can write for the Martlet and encourages other students to do so. 

"By pushing outside my comfort zone in the world of journalism, I found myself engaging with communities outside the world of the arts that shared very similar bonds and passions to those I’d found in my culture work. I got the opportunity to help amplify individuals’ voices and play a role, even if minor, in bringing attention to the incredible communities we have here in Victoria.

For me, that’s what being a journalist is all about. As student journalists, first and foremost, our aim is to keep the student population aware of what’s going on around them. But we also play an important role in strengthening community bonds and sharing community stories."

Photo by Michael John Lo

If you're interested in writing for the Martlet, subscribe to the Martlet's newsletter in our bio or DM us! 

#uvic #victoriabc
President Kevin Hall is looking to get student's i President Kevin Hall is looking to get student's input through two town halls and a Reddit AMA. For the full story and details on how to register, head to the link in our bio. #uvic #victoriabc! Correction:March 11 is for undergrads, the dates were accidentally swapped in the creation of this post and we regret the error
Fashion is a massive industry — it employs one i Fashion is a massive industry — it employs one in six people worldwide. But according to Fashion Checker, 93 per cent of brands don't pay their workers a living wage. 

Through thrifting, some UVic students are learning to appreciate the treasure hunt that comes with combing through rows of second-hand clothes. 

For our feature this issue, we spoke to UVic students about why they love thrifting and why they've decided to kick fast fashion to the curb. 

For the full article, head to the link in our bio.
Senior Staff Writer Alexandra Mehl wrote an explai Senior Staff Writer Alexandra Mehl wrote an explainer article about contraception options for the sex and gender issue. 

When it comes to contraception, educating yourself about your options and advocating for your health care is key. In the article (link in bio), we offer more information, quotes from health care practitioners, and links to more resources. 

#uvic #victoriabc
Here's a little teaser of our sex and gender issue Here's a little teaser of our sex and gender issue...swipe to flip through! Free copies are available throughout campus or at one of our boxes downtown. 💟 PS cover by @siemingly, photo by @julianasech_

!1. Q+A with poet @jaye_simpson by @christopherdriscoll 
2. fine arts students say their art, which involves nudity, is being removed by instagram by @michaeljohnlo 
+ a powerful reflection on drag by Annie Konstantinova 
3. Our feature! By @christopherdriscoll and @kileyverb.docx - looks at gender identity and expression in the context of COVID-19 
4. An article on the asexuality spectrum by Jodie Brady-Quinton and one on the types of birth control by Ally Mehl
5. Last but certainly not least, @christopherdriscoll discusses the importance of queer venues 

#uvic #victoriabc
Issue 11 of Vol. 73 of the Martlet is coming out t Issue 11 of Vol. 73 of the Martlet is coming out tomorrow. We've got stories on queer pubs, birth control, Victoria Film Fest, and profiles on community organizations and individuals like jaye simpson.

Read it all on martlet.ca

#yyj
#Victoria
#UVic
Some excerpts from an op-ed in our latest Indigeno Some excerpts from an op-ed in our latest Indigenous issue with @uvicnsu — the full article is live on our website. All photos and words by Amy Nichols.
BREAKING - UVic has moved $80M from the working ca BREAKING - UVic has moved $80M from the working capital fund to a short-term bond. This means that the $225M working capital fund is now free of any fossil fuel investments.

For more on UVic's investment, check out our last explainer post. A full article about the announcement will be posted soon.

@TheMartlet

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Our paper is written and published on the unceded lands of the Lekwungen peoples, and the Songhees, Esquimalt, and W̱SÁNEĆ peoples whose relationships with this land continue to this day. The Martlet Publishing Society is an incorporated B.C. Society and operates based on our Statement of Principles. We strive to act as an agent of constructive social change and will not publish racist, sexist, homophobic or otherwise oppressive copy.
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