By PJ Zap
OMG, I just love cookies! Don’t you? They’re so good, right? Some have raisins or chocolate and some don’t, but then they have other stuff. Well, maybe they don’t, but they’re still totally good. At least, I think they are. I’m sure you do too, ha ha. Or . . . what’s wrong with you?! Ha ha ha.
Wait, what’s that you say? You don’t think cookies are good?! Lol, you are so wrong! I now want you to use your imagination and imagine. You are walking along and, uh-oh, you’re hungry. Aww, ha ha. What do you want to eat? You’re like, “OMG, I should eat a salad,” but that’s boring, and anyway you don’t have a salad. Then you’re like, “Okay, I’ll eat celery or fruit or whatever,” but that’s stupid and you don’t. So what do you eat? Cookies, of course!
In addition to chocolate chip and oatmeal, there are also Oreos and all the other kinds. Even gingerbread is a type of cookie! I bet you never ever looked around and saw how many cookies there are!
OMG, so many cookies! Ha ha!
When you really stop to be philosophical and contemplate, you see that, in essence, everything we eat is a type of cookie, basically. Okay, maybe they’re not made of flour or whatever, but there can still be diversity, you know! Not all cookies have to be the same!!!!! Stop being such a conformist! Now you’ll finally see that muffins are kind of cookies, and even other foods like bananas and even apples are almost like cookies, or maybe the “cousins of cookies”! Mind. Blown.
You’re probably wondering what my favourite type of cookie is. Right? Well, don’t worry. I’ll tell you! Da-da-duuuuhhh! (OMG, the suspense!) My favourite type of cookie is . . . the cookie . . . I’m eating . . . right now!!! Ha ha ha!!! But also I like chocolate chip best, because, OMG, chocolate, right? Right??!!
But you should also watch your health and stuff, obviously so don’t eat too many cookies. Or . . . maybe . . . you should, ha ha!