humour

A-List: 10 rules I made to start this academic year off right

1. I will go to every class without exception Except when it’s raining or sunny—can’t go to class feeling depressed or distracted! 2. I will bring a homemade lunch to…

A-List: Free stuff and how to use it

S.W.A.G.— It’s Stuff We All Get, but what’s one to do with all the stuff once we’ve, you know, gotten it?   Plastic water bottle Drinking from this vessel will…

You know you’re a first year when

Well, class has just begun, you’ve settled into residence and you’re thinking that this is how your first year will play out. You’re wrong. You’ve only had a taste, but…

Bear sues for slander in response to accusations of attempted assault

HUMOUR — A Victoria local, Derrick Langer, reported that he was attacked by a black bear during a hike near Cordova Beach last Wednesday. According to Langer, the hike started…

A-List: Oh boy, it’s sunny

In case my sarcastic tone did not come across in the headline, let me explain.

Scientists create jumbo shrimp, discover new element

Monsanto scientists began working towards making genetically modified shrimp for the popular restaurant chain Red Lobster, but created more than they had intended.

A letter from airport security

Mr. Sampson, we have your Selsun Blue dandruff shampoo.

Holiday cooking to be unthankful for

I am a terrible cook. I have, on several occasions: burnt Minute Rice so that it is unrecognizable; served lasagna in bowls due to its soupy consistency; and forgotten a…

Hello there, Mr. Johnson

A guide to naming your junk (yes, only you can name it)