Posts Categorized: Humour

Nutrition, flavour, and other wonders to be found in residence meals

In light of recent events, the Martlet has found it pertinent to update previous statements regarding UVic’s Food Services. Reports now show campus food to not only be entirely reliable and safe for mass ingestion, but also just about the healthiest cuisine available on Vancouver Island. Vegetarian, pescetarian, and vegan options are overwhelming. Village Greens… Read more »

International students thrilled at prospect of tuition hikes

According to a recent poll commissioned by the UVic Board of Governors, 97 per cent of UVic’s international students reported feeling “moderately excited to completely thrilled” about the increase in their tuition fees. The remaining three per cent of students were seen being shuffled into a Degrees Catering van, described by various sources as having… Read more »

Valentine’s Day coupons for you and yours

Frantically searching for a last minute gift for your loved one that will perfectly articulate those feelings you’ve been feeling? The Martlet has covered. Cut out any and all of our handy coupons—perfect for relationships in every stage of decline.

Lunar eclipse means Valentine’s Day horoscopes not so ideal

With the lunar eclipse occurring right before Valentine’s Day, everything appears to have gone wack this year. From incest to crippling loneliness to possible death, looking to the stars for love may not be in the cards for you this time around. Nonetheless, read on for important details regarding the dreaded day of love, heed… Read more »